I Scream No Ice Cream

"The one who hates correction will die."

             Proverbs 15:10b.

Sometimes people around us that we love dearly suffer steadily.  Their entire lives are a struggle.  There doesn't seem to be much that we can do about it, no matter what we try.

I feel for these people- it's sad and depressing to think of someones entire life being such a struggle.  Typically people who struggle in one area will slowly start to struggle in other areas as well, before you know it their entire life is a series of sad dramatic car wrecks.

If they're getting bad results consistently, maybe they need to do something differently?

People with tough lives usually hate correction.  They don't want to hear their friends advice, or if they do, they don't follow through with change.  Their parents, counselors, pastors, co-workers, and bosses cannot get through to them.  Can anyone correct a person who hates correction and is unwilling to change?

Tree ringed coffee mugs

There is only one letter of difference in the spelling of the words "laughter" and "slaughter".  Yet their meanings are vastly different.  This reminds me of the often weighed tension of judging events as a blessing or a curse.

Hearsay says that the grass is always greener on the other side, but I met someone who has been there, and they said that grass was too much upkeep.

I started collecting coffee mugs so that I can sip down the memories from my life after I'm too old to do anything else.

Rule at life rule #49

If you're not enjoying a book stop reading it.  There are too many millions of books in the world to drag your eyes through a lemon.

Whether it's a blessing or a curse is debatable

Whether it's a blessing or a curse is debatable.  I'm a planner, a thinker, and obsessor.

Failures and successes rarely catch me by surprise, as there are few angles I don't consider before they happen.

My counselor asked me why do you give power to these fantasies?  I think he was patronizing me.

He said life is like a game of chess, and you needn't need consider your next move until life has made its next move.

Rule at life rule #28

Leave the party last.  You'll have a better chance of scoring leftovers.

The first time I used my magic wand

Realtors have a magical key that gets them into any house in the entire world.  I've never seen Harry Potter, but I'm guessing the Realtor key is basically the equivalent of Harry's wand.

When I first got my Real Estate key I was extremely excited to put my snazzy new powers to use.  All I needed was someone to show houses to.

Fast forward a couple weeks, and Christmas had finally come in the form of a phone call from an old co-worker.

What!  You want me to show you a house?!

No... said Travis, I actually need you to let me into a house... my house... that's already for sale... that I'm locked out of.


Oh.

Now this wasn't the picturesque first magical key use I'd been dreaming of.  I even almost said no.

Milking Conferences

I'm not talking about conferences on milking (Do those exist?), I'm taking about getting the most out of a conference.

I've heard it said, "Education without implementation is just plain entertainment."

Information overload is a polite description of the intensity I've experienced at most conferences.

I've been reflecting on this since returning from a 2 day conference last week, wondering how do I best make sense of all the madness?

I realized the key for me is going 3 deep:

Level one: Letting the stuff hit me as it comes, scribbling notes like a mad man as I do my best imitation of a sponge during the actual conference.

My wife knows more about cars than I do

A car enthusiast was showing my wife and I some photos of some cars he was working on.  I admitted to him that Esther knows much more about cars than I do.

He asked if that was ever embarrassing.

mmmh, I shoulder shrugged a "whatever" response.

In hindsight, I really like the fact that Esther knows more about cars than me.

I like that we each know more about different things.  Not everything we know and are interested in are completely predictable cliche's.

Men are supposed to like football and know more about cars, and woman are supposed to cook and scrapbook.  That's fine if that's what you're into, but I think a lot of people are just insecure about breaking away from cultural expectations.

It's often easier to listen to the voice of others rather than your own.

Storyline, thoughts on living a spicier life

Clarifying something worthy of pursuing with your life will make your life into a better story, and therefore a better life.

This is the main idea I took away from "Storyline", founded by "Blue Like Jazz" author Don Miller.  Whether you encounter Storyline through a conference (like I recently did in San Diego), the book, or a small group, Storyline is all about helping people live better stories.                                                              
         

                                                    "The stories we live effect others.  

When you have a clear plan, people are inspired." -Don Miller

Don Miller

The main example Don used to not focus your life on, was something trivial, such as buying a Volvo.  If someone's main goal in life is buying a Volvo, and they work overtime and save up money to buy one, that's really not a very interesting story, or an interesting life.


"Some people are waiting to see what God does, but what if he's waiting to see what you do?" -Allison Vesterfelt



Now the people that spoke at the conference with the spotlight shining on them were leading naturally spicy lives.  That is to say, they were doing remarkably interesting things.  Starting schools to reform witch doctors, having 500 people over for dinner, having breakfast with Mel Gibson to discuss their screenplay "Braveheart", etc.

Rest in Peace, David

My heart is so shattered for you, old friend.
You were the greatest friend a kid could ask for.
You always made us laugh.
You always challenged us.
You were always a little braver,
and more courageous.
Even when to a fault.
I don't know if you ever knew fear,
while most of us had him on speed dial.
You were a Daredevil in your own right.
You had this lightness to you, but extreme passion as well.
The unique ingredients that made you so damn remarkable.
You always had adventure ingrained in your heart, Smiley.

Thank you for showing me how to live.
Thank you for changing my life for the better, in ways I will surely never forget.
Our endless memories and adventures will always be a part of who I am, old friend.
I will never not mourn for you, brother.
I love you, David.
Rest in Peace.

Bad Joke of the Month

What do dyslexic atheists who have insomnia spend their nights doing? 

Wondering if there really is a dog.

Fail Safe Comedy

Why every joke is safe if it's labeled as a bad joke... because then if no one laughs your judgement wont be questioned, and if they do laugh, then you've not only made a funny, but you're also ironically extra witty.  Of coarse, no matter how many bad jokes I try and make, I still haven't heard a peep from any of my stuffed animals.

The farce of growing up

The older I get the more I realize growing up is a myth.  We get older and more responsible, we learn new conditioning and explore the findings of new found awareness and opportunity.  We grow in resilience and understanding, and we may get wrinkled and grey, but the idea of growing up, It's not us but only our actions that change.  The moment we lose our inner child is the moment we've become disconnected with who we are and our ability to simply grow.

I suppose the distinction really lies between growing up and growing out.  We need not grow out of our true self to simply grow up, for growing up is an illusion.  I have seen this demonstrated best when I heard author, Sherman Alexie, speak.  He was able to be the most immature yet wisest man in a packed room of about 2,000 people.  So distinctly, that it was one of the first questions someone in the audience asked- "how can you be so wisely well spoken while simultaneously acting like a 5 year old?"
"FAAAART" noise, I think was the first thing that came out of Sherman's mouth.  Then he got quiet for a minute and thought, and he said, "I think I'm the same age now as any age I have ever been."

Wary of OK

I've always been wary of OK jobs.  I've always wanted heart or harvest without having to be someones else's cog in between.  The heart-filled starving artist allure lessens as I grow older; the more the reality of adult hood scrambles over me.  The river of mediocrity is a harry & scary blunder to jump, but accessible as ever in our technological age.   Eventually I'll have to jump the river no matter what, at least try.  I think maturity is being OK with not making it, really wanting to, but realizing it's not what really matters, when you grow up.

Like Suckers

As I grow older I am becoming more aware of my uniqueness... my lack of tolerance for domineering types.  My passive self just can't seem to co-exist with out spoken jabber jaws.  They leave me selfless in a pool of nothingness. 

The worst part is, despite my identifying this problem, I still haven't figured out how to break free of these moments with good form.  If someone is presenting to me directly, as opposed to conversing, where I would normally be able to get a word in and be heard, how can I break free in the middle of their their life sucking rant?  Do I owe them the courtesy of informing them of the discomfort they breed?  Or do I try and do a patch job and pretend like I need to use the restroom, or something? 

Whatever the case, I typically can't think well when I'm in fire breathing range anyway.  Maybe I need to invent a button on the cell phone you can push that will make it start ringing..

Serious Breakfast Conversation

Had a serious conversation about jokes over breakfast this morning.  How many good jokes do you know?  When is the last time you told or heard one?  The funny thought raised serious concern, when I realized how joke starved the world around me seems to be.  Not to say this funny matter in of itself is all the serious, but what it represents unnerves me.  If I haven't learned to make people laugh, then what have I learned?

Reflection on making a PB&J Sandwich

A knife done spreading
oozed with the red & butter,
pressure applied
from the facet.

The red runs
like fresh blood,
the butter sticks
resiliently-

Pressured better
by the mouths rudder
tastes so good,
as it should..

Close to the edge
of sharpness,
under pressure,
effectively changed

Back to normal.
No waste,
but the blood,
down the drain.

Race Lies

Words with friends
words with.. self
from self
true
bold
& brave
greivances
from the soul
of our
grave
turning
easy
hiding quietly
grace filled riots
dance inside of me
quiet storm
warnless
& warrantless
happlessness
disguised in
blessed forgetfulness
sea surges
urchin splurges
like claw hands
on Christmas
reached with prayer
stunting grace
ambiguity drowns
another unsung face
again
& again
searching for bumpers
in this soulless
race
searching for a finish line
to take our place.

Talk is cheap... as is technology

Technology is kind of like "talk", it's often cheap on its own accord.  I share this thought from a position of defense; upon reflecting on my recent actions...  I did my first round of mail out marketing for my business this week, and a friend made a comment about the fact that I was wasting paper.  Was I?

I see the argument, for certain.  It would make more logical sense to just email my material, save the paper, save the $.45 stamp, save the $.25 color printing cost, save all the time hand addressing each envelope and having to take a trip to the post office, that would make logical sense.  Unfortunately, if everything we did was purely for logic's sake, then why would we ever even interact with one another face to face other than to reproduce?  Why meet when we can talk on the phone, or even better, email, or text, or video chat?  Why acknowledge the fact that we have hearts and souls and that life means anything if none of it makes logical sense?  Why even reproduce? 

Life's purpose isn't logic, logic is more like life's anti-purpose.  If you ask me, (which you haven't, but you're reading this, so tough,) life's about engagement, connection, and growth.  Things like technology and logic, simple tools for a complex world filled with layered lives worth spending $.70 on attempting to connect with. 

Advice of the week

"Don't worry about what you do, just make sure THAT you do"; is a tidbit of wisdom a friend recently bestowed upon me.  I don't think it applies to all areas of life, but certainly many.  How easily we can get hung up on details and lose our momentum.  Many ideas never find fruition due to lack of action.  Worrying, obsessing, or perfecting what to do is easy.  Simply doing it, that's when life can start living.